Guess You Should Have Gone to Rehab...

Today’s word is irony. Say it with me. Irony.

Late last week, in a move that surprised absolutely no one, presidential hopeful Barack Obama announced that he will forego $80 million in public financing and continue to raise record-breaking amounts of money on his own. This drew the ire of the McCain campaign, which wasted no time in labeling Obama a “flip-flopper” on the issue of public financing of political campaigns. According to McCain, Obama promised to accept public financing and abide by the rules of such a campaign if his opponent did the same. Of course, as it always is in politics, the truth is actually a little more nuanced. Obama promised to aggressively pursue an agreement with the opposing candidate to utilize public funding, if the opponent did the same. McCain, the opponent, did not officially accept public financing of his campaign until after Obama declared he would not. But truthfully, the facts are neither here nor there. The essence of the argument is as follows. A long time ago, Obama implied he would accept public financing. At the time he made said nuanced statement, no one anticipated the ridiculous amounts of money that would be raised during this campaign season. The candidates thought this would be a campaign on par with campaigns of the past. Oops. At this point, John McCain can’t buy fundraising, while Obama is growing greenbacks in his back yard. Why would Obama want to be limited to $80 million when he has already raised three times that during the primaries alone? And of course McCain wants to limit his opponent to public financing. He would be fortunate to raise another $80 million without the help of the system.

I guess I’m not as disturbed by Obama’s reversal on public financing than some other people. The purpose of the public financing system is to ensure that the public is not excluded from political influence at the expense of larger, wealthier donors. The Obama campaign has amassed over 1.5 million donors contributing less than $200 each. Sounds like public financing to me. Besides, conservatives should have two reasons to be excited. One, they hate public financing anyway. Because the government shouldn't pay for anything that doesn't blow stuff up, invade people's privacy, or keep out Mexicans. And two, Obama just saved the taxpayers $84 million. What’s not to like?

Candidates need to be careful when throwing around charges of “flip-flopping.” First, “flip-flopping” is a ridiculous word. No one should use it. Second, no one is immune from this type of charge. There isn’t a single politician who has not changed his or her mind on some issue at some point in time. Circumstances change and opinions evolve over time and as evidence becomes available. Now, I’m sure there are legitimate circumstances under which a candidate can be labeled as changing one’s mind for political gain. But if Obama “flip-flopped” on campaign finance, did McCain “flip-flop” on offshore drilling, immigration reform or certain interrogation techniques? There seems to be a fine line between “flip-flopping” and refining one’s position.

Oh, by the way, I'm a little tired of people pretending they don't know anything about Barack Obama's policies, and using that to justify their "uncertainty" about voting for him. If you truly don't know anything, it's because you've intentionally turned him out every time he's tried to tell you. How many policy speeches does he need to give on financial market reform, alternative energy, tax reform, the Iraq war, foreign policy and the like before people will admit he has a plan? How many times does he need to explain that he wants to eliminate income taxes for seniors making less than $50,000 a year, return the capital gains tax rate to between 25% and 28%, increase fuel economy standards, dramatically increase the amount spent on alternative energy, remove up to two brigades from Iraq per month, regulate Wall Street speculators, etc., before some people will admit that they really do know all that stuff and it has little to do with their "uncertainty" about voting for him? If you don't like what Senator Obama stands for, just say so. But don't pretend you don't know what he stands for.

A report issued today revealed that during the past seven years, the Justice Department routinely turned down highly qualified applicants with sparkling resumes from the nation’s finest institutions because they were deemed “liberal” or “Democratic”, and instead accepted less qualified applicants found to be more “conservative.” Is ANYONE remotely surprised by this? Anyone at all? The Bush Justice Department put politics ahead of justice. I’m stunned.

Zimbabwean opposition leader Morgan Tvsangirai has withdrawn from what he terms a “...sham of an election process,” and taken refuge in the Dutch embassy amidst rampant violence and the murder of his party members by persons affiliated with President Robert Mugabe’s ruling party. As a result, Mugabe will be declared the winner of the upcoming “election” this Friday, ensuring the continuation of what may be the most self-destructive African regime of the last quarter century. As usual, the rest of the world, including Zimbabwe’s African neighbors, gave speeches condemning Mugabe’s campaign of violence, but took no action whatsoever to correct the situation. Many question Tvsangirai’s decision to revoke his candidacy so close to an election which could potentially end the 26-year disaster that has been Mugabe’s rule. But people need to understand something. Heroes are still human beings. Tsvangirai has family and friends and co-workers and many others whom are put at risk of life and limb by his candidacy, and he has to be conscious of that fact. It’s not like America where more often that not the worst thing that happens to you when you disagree with the establishment is that you change the channel. At least for now, Tsvangirai lives to fight another day.

Two presidential tracking polls released within the past few days show Barack Obama leading John McCain by 12 to 15 points. These pollsters need to put down the marijuana cigarettes and get themselves a cup of coffee to calm their nerves. Polls should reflect what is happening, not what could or might or should happen. Yes, given all the factors, this is an election Democrats should win in a landslide. But, almost in spite of themselves, the Republicans have managed to nominate the one candidate they had who could give the Democrats a run for their money. Despite seven years of (insert noun /adjective combination here), this country is still closely divided and this will be a close election. Attempting to lull people into false senses of security or panic with voodoo polling does a disservice to this process.

Don Imus once again finds himself waist deep in the big muddy. The apparently 700-year-old Imus has decided to follow his much-publicized episode with the Rutgers women’s basketball team last year with a new racially-charged senior moment involving Dallas Cowboys cornerback Adam “Pacman” Jones. In discussing Jones’ multiple arrests with his sportscaster, Imus seemed to imply that the reason Jones has found himself in so much trouble is because that is what young black men do. Imus said - the following day - that he was making a sarcastic point that blacks are often unfairly targeted by police. “What people should be outraged about is that they arrest blacks for no reason, and I mean there's no reason to arrest this kid six times," he said. "They shoot blacks for no reason." It might have helped his case had he made that point a little clearer at the time he made the original comment.

The U.S. Conference of Mayors met in Miami this past week and resolved to ban bottled water from all city buildings. Right. No resolution to reduce gun violence, no mass transit initiatives, no plans for community redevelopment. Just a ban on bottled water. Way to take a stand.

Saudi Arabia agreed to increase oil production by 300,000 barrels this week. Due to attacks on their oil pipelines, Nigeria decreased production by 300,000 barrels a day. The market yawned and gas prices rose three cents.

New York-based architect David Fisher has unveiled plans to construct an 80-story shape-shifting skyscraper in Dubai. It will be the first building in the world which will be able to continuously alter its physical appearance. Each floor, powered by wind turbines, will reportedly be able to rotate independently, allowing someone to reshape the building according to the shapes he or she finds in their Spaghetti O’s. Units will sell for approximately $3,000 per square foot. No, that is not a misprint. This just goes to prove, you just can’t give rich people money.

Finally, the denials issued by her publicist would seem to confirm reports that British pop-tart Amy Winehouse may have developed emphysema at the tender age of 24. Sigh. According to her father, Winehouse’s chain smoking and use of crack cocaine may have contributed to her condition. Guess that’s why you shouldn’t smoke crack. Let’s not downplay what she’s accomplished here. Amy Winehouse has managed to achieve in a quarter century what takes many people 70 or 80 years to accomplish.