There is some big news this week. The President nominated what would be the first Hispanic Supreme Court Justice to the high court on Tuesday, and in response, de-facto GOP leader Rush Limbaugh revealed himself once again to be the blithering idiot a growing number of people understand him to be. The California Supreme Court upheld Proposition 8, as well as the 18,000 same-sex marriages performed in the state before it’s passage. A “homegrown” terrorist plot was foiled in New York City by fake weapons provided by the F.B.I. Mike Tyson’s 4-year-old daughter died in a treadmill accident at her home. And Ashton Kutcher threatened to stop twittering. But I’ll get to all that stuff later this week. Something’s been bothering me for several days now, and I want to get through that first.
Several years ago, before achieving moderate success in Hollywood, Dwayne Johnson was a W.W.E. professional wrestler known as “The Rock.” His character was brash, boisterous, arrogant and clever, a huge force of personality, and even as a heel (bad guy, for those not fluent in rastling-speak) he was an enormous fan favorite. As the Rock he delivered many witty quips and biting one-liners to the roar of an approving crowd. However, the witticism relevant to what I’d like to write about would happen as follows: During backstage “interviews,” the Rock would spend a few moments chatting up the interviewer, complimenting him/her on a question or an article of clothing. This would lead the interviewer to drop his/her guard an warm up to him a little. The Rock would then throw out a rather innocuous question, like asking the interviewer his/her name. And as soon as the interviewer opened his/her mouth to respond, the Rock would snatch the microphone from a startled interviewer, look him/her dead in the eyes and scream, “It doesn’t matter what your name is!,” then launch into his remarks concerning the upcoming match. I like to refer to that tactic as “controlling the message.”
Modern politics is a little like professional wrestling. Two bitter rivals, hyping themselves through interviews and public appearances, throwing metaphorical elbows and drop-kicks and head-butts in the policy debate, pinning the opponent by winning elections and legislative battles, then going out for a beer with the rest of the guys after the show. But more often than not, the real winner of a wrestling watch is not the guy that pinned his opponent, but the guy that controlled the message and the narrative of his character. Politics is no different. Winners control the message. Winning gives them the ability to so, and the fact that they do so enables further victories. It is a lesson all winners must learn in order to maintain their position at the top. And no winners in the history of politics more desperately need to understand this than the Democratic party.
This past week, the party lead by a president elected in an electoral college landslide, the party with a filibuster-proof 60-vote majority in the Senate, the party with more votes in the House than they know what to do with, was completely and utterly defeated in the media this week by a party crushed in the past two two elections, feuding amongst itself and still without a legitimate leader. How did this happen? Because the Democrats failed to control the message. Democrats don’t know how to be winners.
Republicans understand one thing VERY well. Fear. The success of the Republican party is dependent upon creating a perpetual state of fear and loathing. As long as people are terrified, Republicans believe people will turn to them for protection from the ghouls and ghosts and goblins waiting to devour us just beyond our borders - and along the East and West coasts. And last week, the Democrats folded like a bad poker hand, the same way they’ve done time and time again in the face of even the most pathetic opposition. Save for six, every last Democratic senator voted against funding the closing of the Guantanamo Bay detention center, a policy every single one of them voraciously endorsed barely four months ago. Instead of making the case that torture is amoral and unethical and should not be undertaken by agents of the U.S. government, Democrats wasted valuable time and resources trying to track down whether or not the CIA gave briefings when they said they did and what the Speaker of the House may or may not have known and when she may or may not have known it.
“But Mark, Nancy Pelosi knew...” IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT NANCY PELOSI KNEW, OR WHEN SHE KNEW IT! Torture is evil, and those who practice torture should be forced to face the consequences of their actions, regardless of who they are. I’ll be the last person to call for an investigation of the previous administration, for reasons I’ve detailed many times before. But if there is going to be some sort of investigation, then everybody connected with torture should be punished, regardless of party affiliation. If it turns out that the Speaker is culpable in some manner, then let the punishment fit the crime. The fact that she may or may not have been told some ambiguous morsel of classified information has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not people were waterboarded 183 times. NOTHING!
“But Mark, Dick Cheney says that if we don’t torture people and intern them indefinitely, then terrorism...” IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT DICK CHENEY SAYS! EVER! For six years nobody could get this guy to open his mouth to anyone with any information whatsoever! Now that nobody is interested in anything he has to say, he won’t shut up! Stop cowering in fear every single time someone utters the words national security! The Guantanamo Bay detention facility will be closed because America doesn’t hold suspects indefinitely without charge, without trial and without punishment. “Terrorists” will not be “released” onto the mainland to hide in your hedges and crawl in through your basement windows while you’re asleep. There are already more than a few convicted terrorists held currently in the nation’s supermax prison, none of them “radicalizing” the prison population, no attempts made to “liberate” them by sympathetic individuals or groups. How many assaults have been made on Guantanamo Bay to free the prisoners?
Grow a spine, Democrats. Quit cannibalizing each other the moment the opposition points a finger at you. And when somebody tries to slap a bumper sticker on you, stalk across the parking lot and key their car. You won the election, act like it. Your President is. Instead of sticking your finger in his eye, try learning something from him. In fact, learn this first: the media is not your friend. It is your tool. Use it to communicate your message. The media will print, blog or broadcast whatever you want, so long as it makes headlines. The President figured this out, who haven’t you? Give the media what it wants, give it headlines. Just make sure they’re your headlines. And make sure the message is loud and clear - louder and clearer than anything your opponents can eek out in the pauses between your sentences. It doesn’t matter what they think. When you want their opinion, you’ll give it to them. If you start acting like winners, people might actually begin to believe you are winners. Imagine the possibilities.
5.21.2009
Resolved
I am watching a fascinating episode of Frontline regarding the makings of the current financial crisis and just how close we came to absolute disaster. This is the second time I’ve watched this and it’s just as riveting this time as it was the first time.
So, the big news of the weekend seems to have been President Obama’s appearance at the commencement ceremonies of the University of Notre Dame. In case some people have been living under rocks for the past four months, Notre Dame, a Catholic institution, has been roundly criticized by a particularly vocal group of Catholics and pro-life organizations for granting a pro-choice President an honorary law degree and allowing him to address the graduating class. The way cable news covered the weeks leading up to the speech one might have expected the pope himself to arrive from Rome with a literal army of cardinals, bishops and 700 Club members, ready to retake the sacred institution from the defilement of the presence of the President of the United States. However, as so often happens in these situations, the adults threw tantrums, acting like children and it was left up to the kids to remind them how to act like adults. While grown men tried to shout down the speech, pushed strollers with dolls covered in fake blood along the quad and flew banners with images of aborted fetuses over the campus, the students (95% of whom supported extending the invitation to Obama to speak) respected the office of the President, applauded when appropriate and showed the rest of the country that Americans are more than capable of civil disagreement without resorting to the demonization of the opposing point of view. Cheers to Notre Dame for inviting the President to speak. Cheers to Barack Obama for showing up and tackling serious issues with tact and diplomacy. And cheers to the Fightin’ Irish class of 2009 for demonstrating a dignity so often lacking in our society.
RNC Chairman Michael Steele found himself back in the news this week, vowing to take President Obama “head on” in the coming weeks. In remarks to an RNC meeting in Maryland, Steele told Republicans that “the era of apology is over,” and that a Republican resurgence is beginning. “This change comes in a tea bag,” he declared. Sigh. Still with the tea, huh. The one benefit Steele does seem to bring to the GOP is that he is often an amusing distraction from the ideological and intellectual cannibalism consuming the Republican party. Taking his tea-bagging message to the hip hop precincts.
Speaking of Michael Steele, the RNC as adopted a resolution demanding the Democratic party “stop pushing our country toward socialism.” This is a slight modification from the original resolution demanding the Democratic party rename itself the “Democrat Socialist Party.” Two things. First, you tried this already, remember? Black radical, Weather Underground, Obama sounds like Osama, fascists are communists are Democrats? You lost by eight million votes. Second, you might want to spend a little less time grandstanding and trying to define your opponent, and a little more time trying to define yourselves. Doesn’t matter who your opponent is if you don’t know who you are.
President Obama has selected Utah Governor Jon Huntsman to serve as U.S. Ambassador to China. Huntsman, a Republican fluent in Mandarin, was more than a little surprised at his selection, yet accepted the post anyway – pending confirmation by the Senate. Huntsman was considered by some to be a strong senatorial candidate in 2010 and perhaps even a presidential candidate in 2012. But he has decided to put those ambitions on hold for a while to serve in the administration of a political rival. Utah’s a lit like China, right? Sparsely populated, nothing but small towns and a leisurely pace of life. He should feel right at home.
Most Democrats cheered when on only his first full day in office, Barack Obama signed an executive order to close the detention center at Guantanamo Bay within a year. They would finally be rid of this legally dubious public relations nightmare carried over from the previous administration. They didn’t care how it happened, only that it did. But after a brief respite from the politics of fear, rumors and accusations began to swirl, accusations were made and panic set in on Capitol Hill. Republicans began to shriek about the President wanting to “release terrorists into the United States.” And instead of rationally refuting the insanity, Democrats all scrambled to be the first to cower under their desks in fear of unfounded accusations. Well done Democrats. That’ll show ‘em.
Let’s be perfectly clear about a few things. NO ONE in the Obama administration has EVER advocated RELEASING TERRORISTS into the United States. Contrary to what former vice president Cheney would like us all to believe, not everyone detained in Cuba committed or supported acts of terrorism against the United States. More than a few detainees have been determined over the course of their hearings to be of no threat to the safety or security of this nation. Of those that have been determined to be combatants or support terrorism, not one would be released to roam the highways and byways of the American countryside. The Justice Department proposal would deport some to whatever foreign countries are willing to take them and move the remaining prisoners to the maximum-security military prison at Fort Leavenworth, Kansas, or the ADX federal supermax prison in Florence, Colorado. Leavenworth is situated in the middle of a U.S. Army base populated by 3,500 soldiers, and ADX Florence currently houses convicted terrorists Ramzi Yousef, Terry Nichols, Ted Kaczynski and Omar Abdel-Rahman to name a few. (Not to mention the brand new, high-tech, maximum security and completely empty prison in Hardin, Montana.) No rational human being could argue that either of those facilities is less safe than the glorified kennel at Guantanamo Bay. Yet instead of taking a stand and permanently burying the politics of fear, Democrats caved in to the NIMBY mentality and now stand willing to oppose out of one side of their mouths the very policy they’ve been cheering from the other side for the past two years. With friends like these, who needs enemies?
Voters in California have rejected all special-election ballot measures designed to close a 20 billion dollar state budget gap. So now, California lawmakers will be forced to return to the legislature to try to hammer out some sort of agreement on massive spending cuts and tax increases to balance the budget. And that went soooo well the last time, didn’t it. There is an old saying, that citizens get the government they deserve. Nowhere in America is this truism more accurate than California. The Golden State’s propensity to litter its ballot with initiatives and clutter its calendar with special elections contributes in no small part to the perpetual paralysis in Sacramento. Before any bill or proposition or initiative is given an opportunity to produce a result, it is superseded, nullified or repealed by another in a special election. The direction of public policy in California depends entirely on which side of the bed the electorate rolls out of on any given morning. For crying out loud people, choose a candidate based out what he/she stands for, vote for him/her, and leave him/her alone to do the job you pay them to do. At the end of his/her term, if you like what he/she did, give him/her a second term, if you don’t, throw the bum out! Please, leave the ballot initiatives to people who actually know what they’re doing.
After being ordered to have her 13-year-old son treated with chemotherapy for his cancer, a Minnesota mother has disappeared with her child rather than obey the court order. According to the doctors, chemotherapy is 95% effective in treating his type of cancer. But his parents opted instead to treat him with holistic medicine, and due to the fact that the holistic treatments were not improving his condition, the court stepped in and ordered the chemo. These cases are always difficult. As a parent, you have the right to raise your children as you see fit. However, at some point, the state has the obligation to step in and protect the welfare of children who are not being protected by their parents. Hopefully someone finds the kid before it’s too late.
Ex-Atlanta Falcon Michael Vick was released from prison yesterday after serving his 18-month sentence for federal dog-fighting convictions. As part of his post-prison rehabilitation program, Vick called the Humane Society and asked to work with them to develop programs aimed at eliminating dog-fighting. Like many people, I’m a little suspicious of Vick’s conversion from animal abuser to animal rights activist. The fact that a demonstration of remorse is a cornerstone of his re-instatement to the NFL cannot be ignored when considering his motives. But there are two other possibilities. One is that the loss of nearly two years of his life, his professional career and 100 million dollars actually brought home the reality of how serious and cruel his actions were, and because of that he has undergone a sobering change of heart. But the other is that maybe his motives don’t really matter all that much, as long as he accomplishes the goal of helping to reduce and eventually eliminate dog-fighting. To paraphrase the Humane Society, “there is a certain segment of society that we can’t reach because they aren’t listening to us, but if they are willing to listen to Michael Vick, then this is a venture worth pursuing.” I tend to agree. I sincerely hope Vick has had a change of heart. But even if he hasn’t, if he can get results where others have failed, more power to him.
Finally, Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker and defensive Player of the Year, James Harrison declined the invitation to travel to the White House with the team to meet the President. The decision was not all that unusual. More than a few athletes on championship teams have declined similar invitations. In fact, Harrison himself declined a previous invitation issued the last time the Steelers won the Superbowl. What made this stand out was the asinine reasoning Harrison offered for his decision. “If you want to see the Pittsburgh Steelers,” Harrison said, “invite us to the White House when we haven’t won the Superbowl. I fully believe he would have invited Arizona had they won instead.” Um, yeah. That’s how it goes Jim. Winner goes to the White House, loser goes to the golf course. Why did you have to say anything? Why not just say you didn’t want to go and save yourself from looking like a complete imbecile. Football players have a hard enough time convincing people they are more than over-paid, muscle-bound buffoons without having you confirm the stereotype.
So, the big news of the weekend seems to have been President Obama’s appearance at the commencement ceremonies of the University of Notre Dame. In case some people have been living under rocks for the past four months, Notre Dame, a Catholic institution, has been roundly criticized by a particularly vocal group of Catholics and pro-life organizations for granting a pro-choice President an honorary law degree and allowing him to address the graduating class. The way cable news covered the weeks leading up to the speech one might have expected the pope himself to arrive from Rome with a literal army of cardinals, bishops and 700 Club members, ready to retake the sacred institution from the defilement of the presence of the President of the United States. However, as so often happens in these situations, the adults threw tantrums, acting like children and it was left up to the kids to remind them how to act like adults. While grown men tried to shout down the speech, pushed strollers with dolls covered in fake blood along the quad and flew banners with images of aborted fetuses over the campus, the students (95% of whom supported extending the invitation to Obama to speak) respected the office of the President, applauded when appropriate and showed the rest of the country that Americans are more than capable of civil disagreement without resorting to the demonization of the opposing point of view. Cheers to Notre Dame for inviting the President to speak. Cheers to Barack Obama for showing up and tackling serious issues with tact and diplomacy. And cheers to the Fightin’ Irish class of 2009 for demonstrating a dignity so often lacking in our society.
RNC Chairman Michael Steele found himself back in the news this week, vowing to take President Obama “head on” in the coming weeks. In remarks to an RNC meeting in Maryland, Steele told Republicans that “the era of apology is over,” and that a Republican resurgence is beginning. “This change comes in a tea bag,” he declared. Sigh. Still with the tea, huh. The one benefit Steele does seem to bring to the GOP is that he is often an amusing distraction from the ideological and intellectual cannibalism consuming the Republican party. Taking his tea-bagging message to the hip hop precincts.
Speaking of Michael Steele, the RNC as adopted a resolution demanding the Democratic party “stop pushing our country toward socialism.” This is a slight modification from the original resolution demanding the Democratic party rename itself the “Democrat Socialist Party.” Two things. First, you tried this already, remember? Black radical, Weather Underground, Obama sounds like Osama, fascists are communists are Democrats? You lost by eight million votes. Second, you might want to spend a little less time grandstanding and trying to define your opponent, and a little more time trying to define yourselves. Doesn’t matter who your opponent is if you don’t know who you are.
President Obama has selected Utah Governor Jon Huntsman to serve as U.S. Ambassador to China. Huntsman, a Republican fluent in Mandarin, was more than a little surprised at his selection, yet accepted the post anyway – pending confirmation by the Senate. Huntsman was considered by some to be a strong senatorial candidate in 2010 and perhaps even a presidential candidate in 2012. But he has decided to put those ambitions on hold for a while to serve in the administration of a political rival. Utah’s a lit like China, right? Sparsely populated, nothing but small towns and a leisurely pace of life. He should feel right at home.
Most Democrats cheered when on only his first full day in office, Barack Obama signed an executive order to close the detention center at Guantanamo Bay within a year. They would finally be rid of this legally dubious public relations nightmare carried over from the previous administration. They didn’t care how it happened, only that it did. But after a brief respite from the politics of fear, rumors and accusations began to swirl, accusations were made and panic set in on Capitol Hill. Republicans began to shriek about the President wanting to “release terrorists into the United States.” And instead of rationally refuting the insanity, Democrats all scrambled to be the first to cower under their desks in fear of unfounded accusations. Well done Democrats. That’ll show ‘em.
Let’s be perfectly clear about a few things. NO ONE in the Obama administration has EVER advocated RELEASING TERRORISTS into the United States. Contrary to what former vice president Cheney would like us all to believe, not everyone detained in Cuba committed or supported acts of terrorism against the United States. More than a few detainees have been determined over the course of their hearings to be of no threat to the safety or security of this nation. Of those that have been determined to be combatants or support terrorism, not one would be released to roam the highways and byways of the American countryside. The Justice Department proposal would deport some to whatever foreign countries are willing to take them and move the remaining prisoners to the maximum-security military prison at Fort Leavenworth, Kansas, or the ADX federal supermax prison in Florence, Colorado. Leavenworth is situated in the middle of a U.S. Army base populated by 3,500 soldiers, and ADX Florence currently houses convicted terrorists Ramzi Yousef, Terry Nichols, Ted Kaczynski and Omar Abdel-Rahman to name a few. (Not to mention the brand new, high-tech, maximum security and completely empty prison in Hardin, Montana.) No rational human being could argue that either of those facilities is less safe than the glorified kennel at Guantanamo Bay. Yet instead of taking a stand and permanently burying the politics of fear, Democrats caved in to the NIMBY mentality and now stand willing to oppose out of one side of their mouths the very policy they’ve been cheering from the other side for the past two years. With friends like these, who needs enemies?
Voters in California have rejected all special-election ballot measures designed to close a 20 billion dollar state budget gap. So now, California lawmakers will be forced to return to the legislature to try to hammer out some sort of agreement on massive spending cuts and tax increases to balance the budget. And that went soooo well the last time, didn’t it. There is an old saying, that citizens get the government they deserve. Nowhere in America is this truism more accurate than California. The Golden State’s propensity to litter its ballot with initiatives and clutter its calendar with special elections contributes in no small part to the perpetual paralysis in Sacramento. Before any bill or proposition or initiative is given an opportunity to produce a result, it is superseded, nullified or repealed by another in a special election. The direction of public policy in California depends entirely on which side of the bed the electorate rolls out of on any given morning. For crying out loud people, choose a candidate based out what he/she stands for, vote for him/her, and leave him/her alone to do the job you pay them to do. At the end of his/her term, if you like what he/she did, give him/her a second term, if you don’t, throw the bum out! Please, leave the ballot initiatives to people who actually know what they’re doing.
After being ordered to have her 13-year-old son treated with chemotherapy for his cancer, a Minnesota mother has disappeared with her child rather than obey the court order. According to the doctors, chemotherapy is 95% effective in treating his type of cancer. But his parents opted instead to treat him with holistic medicine, and due to the fact that the holistic treatments were not improving his condition, the court stepped in and ordered the chemo. These cases are always difficult. As a parent, you have the right to raise your children as you see fit. However, at some point, the state has the obligation to step in and protect the welfare of children who are not being protected by their parents. Hopefully someone finds the kid before it’s too late.
Ex-Atlanta Falcon Michael Vick was released from prison yesterday after serving his 18-month sentence for federal dog-fighting convictions. As part of his post-prison rehabilitation program, Vick called the Humane Society and asked to work with them to develop programs aimed at eliminating dog-fighting. Like many people, I’m a little suspicious of Vick’s conversion from animal abuser to animal rights activist. The fact that a demonstration of remorse is a cornerstone of his re-instatement to the NFL cannot be ignored when considering his motives. But there are two other possibilities. One is that the loss of nearly two years of his life, his professional career and 100 million dollars actually brought home the reality of how serious and cruel his actions were, and because of that he has undergone a sobering change of heart. But the other is that maybe his motives don’t really matter all that much, as long as he accomplishes the goal of helping to reduce and eventually eliminate dog-fighting. To paraphrase the Humane Society, “there is a certain segment of society that we can’t reach because they aren’t listening to us, but if they are willing to listen to Michael Vick, then this is a venture worth pursuing.” I tend to agree. I sincerely hope Vick has had a change of heart. But even if he hasn’t, if he can get results where others have failed, more power to him.
Finally, Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker and defensive Player of the Year, James Harrison declined the invitation to travel to the White House with the team to meet the President. The decision was not all that unusual. More than a few athletes on championship teams have declined similar invitations. In fact, Harrison himself declined a previous invitation issued the last time the Steelers won the Superbowl. What made this stand out was the asinine reasoning Harrison offered for his decision. “If you want to see the Pittsburgh Steelers,” Harrison said, “invite us to the White House when we haven’t won the Superbowl. I fully believe he would have invited Arizona had they won instead.” Um, yeah. That’s how it goes Jim. Winner goes to the White House, loser goes to the golf course. Why did you have to say anything? Why not just say you didn’t want to go and save yourself from looking like a complete imbecile. Football players have a hard enough time convincing people they are more than over-paid, muscle-bound buffoons without having you confirm the stereotype.
5.14.2009
Remainders
Okay. So I missed a few things yesterday. Let’s get to those now, shall we?
Last week, the UK released a list of individuals barred from entering the United Kingdom for fostering extremism or hatred toward other individuals or groups. On the list are leaders of neo-nazi organizations, holocaust deniers, terrorists, and San Fransisco-based radio talk show host Michael Savage. Savage has threatened to sue. Now, I’m no legal expert, but I think that in order to win a defamation suit, Savage would have to prove he is, in fact, not a hater. Trouble is, he has 15 years worth of his radio show as evidence to the contrary.
Newscorp chairman Rupert Murdoch, announced last week that news websites owned by his company - including Fox News and the New York Post - will soon begin charging “handsomely” for the viewing of their content. Uh huh. Murdoch might as well have announced he intends to stuff hundred dollar bills into trash bags and burn them. I’m not sure why Rupert thinks he can get people to pay money for information they can get for free from any number of other websites, but I’m sure there are a number of others in the news industry hoping he can actually pull it off. That future looks pretty bleak right now.
Well, it’s finally happened. The romance born of an old man and a bumper sticker during the the 2008 presidential campaign has finally come to an end. Oh sorrow of sorrows, Joe the Plumber has left the Republican party. You can’t see it, but the tears are flowing over here. Seriously. What are we going to do without Joe the Plumber jokes? Okay, joke. Guess I answered my own question there, didn’t I.
Pop quiz hotshot. Your name is Republican Minority Whip Eric Cantor. Your party just lost control of the presidency and both houses of Congress. Your party chairman has labeled your core voters bigots, and your party spokesman has made it clear that those with opinions differing from his own shouldn’t let the door hit them in the butt on the way out. You’ve formed a committee to travel the country to solicit ideas from the party faithful on how you can recapture your swagger and return to a position of prominence and leadership, but at every turn one of your own leaders stabs you in the back declaring you are leading the party down the road to ultimate ruin. What do you do? What do you do? Well, you issue the following statement in response to your critics, “We don’t lose our principles by broadening the debate.” Eric, that is absolutely true, I’m so relieved you’ve finally come to that conclusion. I’m sure you would now agree with the President when he applies the very same logic to matters of far greater importance than rebuttal of talk-radio hosts, wouldn’t you?
Finally, L.A. Dodgers slugger Manny Ramirez has been suspended for 50 game for taking a “banned substance.” There is no official word on exactly what the banned substance was, but Manny insists it was NOT a steroid. Subsequent reports indicate that the substance is actually a female hormone, often taken by athletes coming off a steroid cycle to return their testosterone to normal levels. So, unless Manny can explain how he got pregnant and what happened to the fetus, he becomes the next in a far too long line of Major League baseball players to be caught cheating the game and the fan by using performance-enhancing drugs. Oh well. Guess that’s just Manny being Manny.
Last week, the UK released a list of individuals barred from entering the United Kingdom for fostering extremism or hatred toward other individuals or groups. On the list are leaders of neo-nazi organizations, holocaust deniers, terrorists, and San Fransisco-based radio talk show host Michael Savage. Savage has threatened to sue. Now, I’m no legal expert, but I think that in order to win a defamation suit, Savage would have to prove he is, in fact, not a hater. Trouble is, he has 15 years worth of his radio show as evidence to the contrary.
Newscorp chairman Rupert Murdoch, announced last week that news websites owned by his company - including Fox News and the New York Post - will soon begin charging “handsomely” for the viewing of their content. Uh huh. Murdoch might as well have announced he intends to stuff hundred dollar bills into trash bags and burn them. I’m not sure why Rupert thinks he can get people to pay money for information they can get for free from any number of other websites, but I’m sure there are a number of others in the news industry hoping he can actually pull it off. That future looks pretty bleak right now.
Well, it’s finally happened. The romance born of an old man and a bumper sticker during the the 2008 presidential campaign has finally come to an end. Oh sorrow of sorrows, Joe the Plumber has left the Republican party. You can’t see it, but the tears are flowing over here. Seriously. What are we going to do without Joe the Plumber jokes? Okay, joke. Guess I answered my own question there, didn’t I.
Pop quiz hotshot. Your name is Republican Minority Whip Eric Cantor. Your party just lost control of the presidency and both houses of Congress. Your party chairman has labeled your core voters bigots, and your party spokesman has made it clear that those with opinions differing from his own shouldn’t let the door hit them in the butt on the way out. You’ve formed a committee to travel the country to solicit ideas from the party faithful on how you can recapture your swagger and return to a position of prominence and leadership, but at every turn one of your own leaders stabs you in the back declaring you are leading the party down the road to ultimate ruin. What do you do? What do you do? Well, you issue the following statement in response to your critics, “We don’t lose our principles by broadening the debate.” Eric, that is absolutely true, I’m so relieved you’ve finally come to that conclusion. I’m sure you would now agree with the President when he applies the very same logic to matters of far greater importance than rebuttal of talk-radio hosts, wouldn’t you?
Finally, L.A. Dodgers slugger Manny Ramirez has been suspended for 50 game for taking a “banned substance.” There is no official word on exactly what the banned substance was, but Manny insists it was NOT a steroid. Subsequent reports indicate that the substance is actually a female hormone, often taken by athletes coming off a steroid cycle to return their testosterone to normal levels. So, unless Manny can explain how he got pregnant and what happened to the fetus, he becomes the next in a far too long line of Major League baseball players to be caught cheating the game and the fan by using performance-enhancing drugs. Oh well. Guess that’s just Manny being Manny.
5.13.2009
In Trump We Trust
Note to self: Jumbo omelette, followed by macho tacos, and rounded out with chips and salsa and mexican style burrito the following day equals two days of gastrointestinal hell spent tethered to the bathroom. Never do that again.
As a result of being tethered to the bathroom, my knowledge of the current events is limited. So, this post will be short, and probably limited to stories with brief headlines and easy punch lines.
Sarah Palin has signed an estimated 7-11 million dollar deal to publish a tell-all book about her life and political experiences. Apparently, Palin can’t wait to, “put (her) journalism degree to work on this and get to tell (her) story, Alaska’s story.” Yeah. You know what nobody cares about? Alaska’s story. But, I guess if people are willing to pay Sarah Palin millions of dollars to rehash things they’ve already heard, more power to them. This story bores me.
Former vice president Dick Cheney is at it again, running his mouth about his support for torture and dislike of Republicans that don’t measure up to his standards of conservatism and his hated of the current administration. What a turn-around for this guy. A medical miracle of sorts. After suffering through what must have been eight excruciating years of verbal constipation, Cheney suddenly can’t contain his verbal diarrhea. I can’t decide which is worse.
During the White House Correspondents’ dinner last Saturday night, President Obama directed some humor at RNC chairman Michael Steele, saying that the Republican party doesn’t qualify for a federal bailout, and that Rush Limbaugh doesn’t qualify as a troubled asset. While intended as a joke, a bailout is something the RNC might seriously want to consider, if they can stop bludgeoning each other long enough file the paperwork. Last week, Steele attacked former presidential candidate Mitt Romney saying the Republican base rejected him because they have issues with Mormonism and question his commitment to opposing abortion. Romney retaliated by suggesting Steele is unable to lead the party. Mike Huckabee savaged the new Republican “listening tour” as pathetic and laughable, and party spokesman Limbaugh made it perfectly clear that the Republican party is for zealots only, “moderates” like Colin Powell, or John McCain, need not apply. The reason Republicans are unable to mount coherent opposition to the Democrats is because they can’t seem to decide what they want that opposition to be. What is shaping up is a battle between conservative ideological purists and conservative pragmatists for control of the Republican party. The winner of that battle will determine the direction of the party and how quickly they will be able to return to prominence. I hope they’re capable of making the right decision. Not terribly hopeful that they will.
Love the new Burger King commercial with the Kingons. Not quite on the level of "phonebook implants," or "butts with sharp right angles," but funny none-the-less.
In a statement released yesterday, owner of the Miss U.S.A. pageant, Donald Trump, stated that despite the fact that she violated pageant rules by failing to disclose the existence of nude and semi-nude photos to officials, Miss California, Carrie Prejean will retain her crown because she’s just “so beautiful.” According to the Donald, if Miss Prejean wasn’t “so beautiful,” no one would care about what she said or what she did. So, because she is “so beautiful,” she should be allowed to flaunt the rules and keep her job. Sigh. In Trump we trust. I hope every single parent of a girl in America reads his statement to their daughters tonight. They have the right to know what type of world they’re growing up in.
As a result of being tethered to the bathroom, my knowledge of the current events is limited. So, this post will be short, and probably limited to stories with brief headlines and easy punch lines.
Sarah Palin has signed an estimated 7-11 million dollar deal to publish a tell-all book about her life and political experiences. Apparently, Palin can’t wait to, “put (her) journalism degree to work on this and get to tell (her) story, Alaska’s story.” Yeah. You know what nobody cares about? Alaska’s story. But, I guess if people are willing to pay Sarah Palin millions of dollars to rehash things they’ve already heard, more power to them. This story bores me.
Former vice president Dick Cheney is at it again, running his mouth about his support for torture and dislike of Republicans that don’t measure up to his standards of conservatism and his hated of the current administration. What a turn-around for this guy. A medical miracle of sorts. After suffering through what must have been eight excruciating years of verbal constipation, Cheney suddenly can’t contain his verbal diarrhea. I can’t decide which is worse.
During the White House Correspondents’ dinner last Saturday night, President Obama directed some humor at RNC chairman Michael Steele, saying that the Republican party doesn’t qualify for a federal bailout, and that Rush Limbaugh doesn’t qualify as a troubled asset. While intended as a joke, a bailout is something the RNC might seriously want to consider, if they can stop bludgeoning each other long enough file the paperwork. Last week, Steele attacked former presidential candidate Mitt Romney saying the Republican base rejected him because they have issues with Mormonism and question his commitment to opposing abortion. Romney retaliated by suggesting Steele is unable to lead the party. Mike Huckabee savaged the new Republican “listening tour” as pathetic and laughable, and party spokesman Limbaugh made it perfectly clear that the Republican party is for zealots only, “moderates” like Colin Powell, or John McCain, need not apply. The reason Republicans are unable to mount coherent opposition to the Democrats is because they can’t seem to decide what they want that opposition to be. What is shaping up is a battle between conservative ideological purists and conservative pragmatists for control of the Republican party. The winner of that battle will determine the direction of the party and how quickly they will be able to return to prominence. I hope they’re capable of making the right decision. Not terribly hopeful that they will.
Love the new Burger King commercial with the Kingons. Not quite on the level of "phonebook implants," or "butts with sharp right angles," but funny none-the-less.
In a statement released yesterday, owner of the Miss U.S.A. pageant, Donald Trump, stated that despite the fact that she violated pageant rules by failing to disclose the existence of nude and semi-nude photos to officials, Miss California, Carrie Prejean will retain her crown because she’s just “so beautiful.” According to the Donald, if Miss Prejean wasn’t “so beautiful,” no one would care about what she said or what she did. So, because she is “so beautiful,” she should be allowed to flaunt the rules and keep her job. Sigh. In Trump we trust. I hope every single parent of a girl in America reads his statement to their daughters tonight. They have the right to know what type of world they’re growing up in.
5.06.2009
Drumsticks
My box of chocolate bars arrived from England today. Cadbury Twisted bars. “Creme egg goo twisted in a chocolate tube.” Worth every euro.
I think I’ll start this week with the biggest, boldest, most earth-shattering headline of the day. President Obama and Vice President Biden went out for burgers today. That’s right, burgers. A burger run, made national news headlines. Apparently, no other president or vice president in the history of the Republic has EVER gone out for burgers. The press core even felt it necessary to report exactly what the president and vice president ordered, that the president was initially disappointed that Ray’s Hell Burger didn’t serve fries, but was placated with cheese and tater puffs, and that he offered to feed all the reporters on his tab despite the offer of an on-the-house meal from the owner. I guess nothing else happened in the world today. Mighty swine flu has been dethroned by a presidential cheeseburger.
Late last week Supreme Court Justice David Souter sort-of-but-not-really announced that he will retire from the court at the end of the term this summer. While not the oldest judge on the court at a relatively youthful 69, Souter has never cared much for Washington D.C., preferring to spend his time huddled away in his New England cabin scribbling thoughts on parchment with his fountain pens. One might think that there would be a certain period of time allotted for quiet reflection upon the nineteen year career of a distinguished Supreme Court justice. Of course, if one thought that, he or she was probably born yesterday and needs to lay off whatever it is he or she puffing. Souter had not officially informed the President or the public of his resignation when talking points and ads against perceived potential nominations hit the airwaves. The cable news pundits were already formulating the “short list,”Congressional Democrats were extolling the virtues of any number of pro-choice female Hispanic candidates and Congressional Republicans were demanding the President select a “strict constructionist” threatening to oppose any nominee that didn’t fit that mold.
Nothing breaks out the boxing gloves out in D.C. like a good old Supreme Court nomination battle. This is President Obama’s first opportunity to leave a lasting impression, and the GOP’s first real opportunity to unify around a single issue. However, this confirmation battle has the potential to deviate slightly from others in recent memory. Since Souter more often than not sided with the more liberal wing of the court on most issues, the appointment of a liberal-leaning judge to replace him would not alter the ideological make-up of the court. And, there is evidence to suggest that in a time of economic and employment uncertainty, the public has less of an appetite for watching representatives bicker over code words for pro-choice and pro-life candidates like “judicial activism” and “strict constructionist.”
Thus far, in spite of all the problems present in this country, the President has gotten the best of the Republican party. Since last October, the percentage of Americans who feel the country is headed in the right direction has jumped from 17% to 48%. Obama’s job approval ratings are in the upper 60s and his personal approval ratings are even higher. Meanwhile, despite a rebranding effort based on communication new ideas like tax cuts and further privatization, Republican approval numbers continue to be dismal. The President is playing them like Sun Tzu did the armies of Chu, and the Republicans either don’t realize it, or are incapable of preventing themselves from taking the bait. I understand that it is the job of the loyal opposition to oppose the party in power, but since that has done such a spectacular job of not working, perhaps they should try something different. Realizing that this Supreme Court appointment isn’t going to alter the make-up of the court, and that there is absolutely no chance of replacing Souter with Scalia lite, perhaps Republicans could try a less aggressive resistance to whatever semi-reasonable nominee the President eventually submits for confirmation. That might give some people the impression that at least on occasion, they are more than just the Party of No.
Quote of the week, from Press Secretary Robert Gibbs last week regarding Biden’s comments on not flying or riding the train due to the threat of swine flu: “I think the Vice President misrepresented what the Vice President wanted to say.” Why are people still surprised that Joe Biden says stupid things? Biden has been saying stupid things for as long as anybody can remember, and he certainly isn’t going to stop saying them simply because he’s vice president. We all knew what we were signing on for. Laugh it off and move on.
Apparently Rush Limbaugh is of the opinion that Sarah Palin is the most prominent and articulate voice for good old-fashioned American conservatism. Ouch. If Sarah Palin is conservatism’s most articulate defender, conservatism has less of a chance at a comeback than the Detroit Lions have of winning the Superbowl.
I haven’t talked much about hockey this playoff season. Mostly because my team has already been eliminated. But there are some great series being played that deserve mention. Chief among them, Washington Capitals vs. Pittsburgh Penguins. Ovechkin vs. Crosby. I don’t particularly care for either team, but I can’t take my eyes off this series. It is a crying shame that this match-up couldn’t play out for the Stanley Cup. Anyway, I’m holding out for a Boston/Vancouver final. I’m sure I’ll end up with the league’s dream scenario of Washington versus Detroit, but one can always hope.
Remember Miss California? Not too long ago she made news for an incredibly inarticulate defense of traditional marriage in answer to a question posed by pageant judge and faux-lebrity Perez Hilton. Mere days after her adoption and (self?)exploitation by opponents of same-sex marriage, word is that she failed to disclose to pageant officials that she had previously posed for nude photographs. All pageant contestants are required to inform pageant officials if they have previously taken nude photographs. Failure to do so is grounds for disqualification, so it appears as though Miss California is on the verge of being stripped of her crown. For her part, Carrie Prejean again claims she is being persecuted for her Christian beliefs, that the release of the pictures is part of a “vicious and mean-spirited” effort to silence her. You know what, all that may be true. I don’t know, and I don’t care. I don’t care that she’s an inarticulate advocate of traditional marriage. I don’t care that she had nude pictures taken of herself - in fact, I encourage it. But what I don’t understand is how Miss Prejean squares her Christianity with her beauty pageant participation. How is it that breast augmentation, topless photos, and strutting up and down a catwalk in a bikini sexually objectifying herself DO NOT conflict with her Christian notions of modesty, sexual purity and reflecting Christ with her actions? I submit that it might be Miss California’s hypocrisy, not her values many people have objected to.
Finally, last week a Rochester, New York television station ran a story on a local Popeye’s restaurant which had run out of fried chicken during a promotion and closed it’s doors for the remainder of the afternoon. The station sent out a camera crew and a reporter to interview angry customers lining up in the drive-thru only to discover there was no chicken. Of course, people were angry. Cheap chicken was promised, no chicken was available, who wouldn’t be upset. Responses ranged from patrons simply deciding to travel to another restaurant location, to irate individuals ranting about how Popeye’s promised cheap chicken, but didn’t order enough chicken and now there wasn’t any chicken and how on earth were they supposed to feed their kids and care for their families and yada yada yada. The problem? Of the dozen people interviewed for the story, every single one of them was black. For those of you who don’t know, there is an old cartoonish stereotype about black people loving fried chicken. And many viewers felt that such a story simply played into that stereotype. That may be true, but it’s painfully obvious that there is more than enough stupidity to go around with this story. I don’t think there’s much (if any) news value in a running a story about a fast food restaurant temporarily running out of chicken. And asking 12 people for their opinion on a fast food restaurant temporarily running out of chicken strikes me as nothing short of gratuitous. But just because someone gives you a microphone and a camera and the opportunity to make an ass of yourself, doesn’t meant you have to do it. Don’t go on camera ranting about how you now can’t feed your family because Popeye’s ran out of chicken. That makes you look like a lunatic. Don’t hand over your dignity on a silver platter. At least make them work for it. And by the way, who in their right mind calls their local television news crew when Popeye’s runs out of chicken? Never mind. I think I answered my own question.
I think I’ll start this week with the biggest, boldest, most earth-shattering headline of the day. President Obama and Vice President Biden went out for burgers today. That’s right, burgers. A burger run, made national news headlines. Apparently, no other president or vice president in the history of the Republic has EVER gone out for burgers. The press core even felt it necessary to report exactly what the president and vice president ordered, that the president was initially disappointed that Ray’s Hell Burger didn’t serve fries, but was placated with cheese and tater puffs, and that he offered to feed all the reporters on his tab despite the offer of an on-the-house meal from the owner. I guess nothing else happened in the world today. Mighty swine flu has been dethroned by a presidential cheeseburger.
Late last week Supreme Court Justice David Souter sort-of-but-not-really announced that he will retire from the court at the end of the term this summer. While not the oldest judge on the court at a relatively youthful 69, Souter has never cared much for Washington D.C., preferring to spend his time huddled away in his New England cabin scribbling thoughts on parchment with his fountain pens. One might think that there would be a certain period of time allotted for quiet reflection upon the nineteen year career of a distinguished Supreme Court justice. Of course, if one thought that, he or she was probably born yesterday and needs to lay off whatever it is he or she puffing. Souter had not officially informed the President or the public of his resignation when talking points and ads against perceived potential nominations hit the airwaves. The cable news pundits were already formulating the “short list,”Congressional Democrats were extolling the virtues of any number of pro-choice female Hispanic candidates and Congressional Republicans were demanding the President select a “strict constructionist” threatening to oppose any nominee that didn’t fit that mold.
Nothing breaks out the boxing gloves out in D.C. like a good old Supreme Court nomination battle. This is President Obama’s first opportunity to leave a lasting impression, and the GOP’s first real opportunity to unify around a single issue. However, this confirmation battle has the potential to deviate slightly from others in recent memory. Since Souter more often than not sided with the more liberal wing of the court on most issues, the appointment of a liberal-leaning judge to replace him would not alter the ideological make-up of the court. And, there is evidence to suggest that in a time of economic and employment uncertainty, the public has less of an appetite for watching representatives bicker over code words for pro-choice and pro-life candidates like “judicial activism” and “strict constructionist.”
Thus far, in spite of all the problems present in this country, the President has gotten the best of the Republican party. Since last October, the percentage of Americans who feel the country is headed in the right direction has jumped from 17% to 48%. Obama’s job approval ratings are in the upper 60s and his personal approval ratings are even higher. Meanwhile, despite a rebranding effort based on communication new ideas like tax cuts and further privatization, Republican approval numbers continue to be dismal. The President is playing them like Sun Tzu did the armies of Chu, and the Republicans either don’t realize it, or are incapable of preventing themselves from taking the bait. I understand that it is the job of the loyal opposition to oppose the party in power, but since that has done such a spectacular job of not working, perhaps they should try something different. Realizing that this Supreme Court appointment isn’t going to alter the make-up of the court, and that there is absolutely no chance of replacing Souter with Scalia lite, perhaps Republicans could try a less aggressive resistance to whatever semi-reasonable nominee the President eventually submits for confirmation. That might give some people the impression that at least on occasion, they are more than just the Party of No.
Quote of the week, from Press Secretary Robert Gibbs last week regarding Biden’s comments on not flying or riding the train due to the threat of swine flu: “I think the Vice President misrepresented what the Vice President wanted to say.” Why are people still surprised that Joe Biden says stupid things? Biden has been saying stupid things for as long as anybody can remember, and he certainly isn’t going to stop saying them simply because he’s vice president. We all knew what we were signing on for. Laugh it off and move on.
Apparently Rush Limbaugh is of the opinion that Sarah Palin is the most prominent and articulate voice for good old-fashioned American conservatism. Ouch. If Sarah Palin is conservatism’s most articulate defender, conservatism has less of a chance at a comeback than the Detroit Lions have of winning the Superbowl.
I haven’t talked much about hockey this playoff season. Mostly because my team has already been eliminated. But there are some great series being played that deserve mention. Chief among them, Washington Capitals vs. Pittsburgh Penguins. Ovechkin vs. Crosby. I don’t particularly care for either team, but I can’t take my eyes off this series. It is a crying shame that this match-up couldn’t play out for the Stanley Cup. Anyway, I’m holding out for a Boston/Vancouver final. I’m sure I’ll end up with the league’s dream scenario of Washington versus Detroit, but one can always hope.
Remember Miss California? Not too long ago she made news for an incredibly inarticulate defense of traditional marriage in answer to a question posed by pageant judge and faux-lebrity Perez Hilton. Mere days after her adoption and (self?)exploitation by opponents of same-sex marriage, word is that she failed to disclose to pageant officials that she had previously posed for nude photographs. All pageant contestants are required to inform pageant officials if they have previously taken nude photographs. Failure to do so is grounds for disqualification, so it appears as though Miss California is on the verge of being stripped of her crown. For her part, Carrie Prejean again claims she is being persecuted for her Christian beliefs, that the release of the pictures is part of a “vicious and mean-spirited” effort to silence her. You know what, all that may be true. I don’t know, and I don’t care. I don’t care that she’s an inarticulate advocate of traditional marriage. I don’t care that she had nude pictures taken of herself - in fact, I encourage it. But what I don’t understand is how Miss Prejean squares her Christianity with her beauty pageant participation. How is it that breast augmentation, topless photos, and strutting up and down a catwalk in a bikini sexually objectifying herself DO NOT conflict with her Christian notions of modesty, sexual purity and reflecting Christ with her actions? I submit that it might be Miss California’s hypocrisy, not her values many people have objected to.
Finally, last week a Rochester, New York television station ran a story on a local Popeye’s restaurant which had run out of fried chicken during a promotion and closed it’s doors for the remainder of the afternoon. The station sent out a camera crew and a reporter to interview angry customers lining up in the drive-thru only to discover there was no chicken. Of course, people were angry. Cheap chicken was promised, no chicken was available, who wouldn’t be upset. Responses ranged from patrons simply deciding to travel to another restaurant location, to irate individuals ranting about how Popeye’s promised cheap chicken, but didn’t order enough chicken and now there wasn’t any chicken and how on earth were they supposed to feed their kids and care for their families and yada yada yada. The problem? Of the dozen people interviewed for the story, every single one of them was black. For those of you who don’t know, there is an old cartoonish stereotype about black people loving fried chicken. And many viewers felt that such a story simply played into that stereotype. That may be true, but it’s painfully obvious that there is more than enough stupidity to go around with this story. I don’t think there’s much (if any) news value in a running a story about a fast food restaurant temporarily running out of chicken. And asking 12 people for their opinion on a fast food restaurant temporarily running out of chicken strikes me as nothing short of gratuitous. But just because someone gives you a microphone and a camera and the opportunity to make an ass of yourself, doesn’t meant you have to do it. Don’t go on camera ranting about how you now can’t feed your family because Popeye’s ran out of chicken. That makes you look like a lunatic. Don’t hand over your dignity on a silver platter. At least make them work for it. And by the way, who in their right mind calls their local television news crew when Popeye’s runs out of chicken? Never mind. I think I answered my own question.
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