Killer Bees

...comic from The Daily Dish

Operation “Top Kill,” is dead. Almost 50 days out and no end in sight. And what many experts feared from the beginning is now almost certain: this well is going to continue to spew oil into the Gulf of Mexico until both relief wells come online to relieve the pressure in August or September. Three or four months into hurricane season. Drill baby drill.

If it isn’t obvious to everyone by now, British Petroleum - and by extension, every other petroleum company operating in deep water - did not and does not have ANY IDEA how to deal with an accident in deep water. They claimed they did, but they lied. Should the government have done a better job verifying their claims? Absolutely. I guess if you tell a government agency it is a miserable failure and completely unnecessary for eight years it will act like a miserable failure. Stupid is as stupid does, right?

Last week, former vice presidential candidate/train wreck Sarah Palin accused President Obama of “not doing enough about the oil spill because he is in the pocket of big oil.” It might be amusing if it weren’t so stupid. In the two years prior to that little gem, Palin and her cohorts have spent every waking moment accusing Barack Obama of establishing himself as the second coming of Vladimir Lenin, driving the country toward socialism. But as soon it it became evident that BP did not have and could not get a handle on their oil spill, Palin and company tried to paint the President as some sort of capitalist pig, refusing to commandeer a private corporation and replace it with the awesome omnipotence of the federal government. Government can be either impotent or omnipotent. Not both.

For 50 years, conservatives have insisted on beating the tar out of the idea of competent, responsible government. The conservative icon himself, Ronald Reagan was elected twice on the platform that “government is the problem.” He didn’t say big government was the problem. He didn’t say bad government is the problem. He said government is the problem. All of it. In the 30 years since then, Reagan and his disciples ran whatever branch of government they controlled as if government were indeed the problem. And instead of attempting to improve it, they simply attempted to downsize and eliminate, competence be damned. Well, at some point that mantra was bound to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

There is a lot of chatter among the talking heads in the media about the “reality of the narrative.” Proof that once again, the media has failed - and continues to fail in it’s primary responsibility, reporting the news. According to the heads, the “reality of the narrative” is that the President must “do more.” More what, nobody seems to know, but he must do something. He must stop the leak, presumably by donning his secret Iron Man armor and descend to the bottom of the ocean to crimp the pipe with his repulser beams. He must single-handedly prevent all the oil from reaching shore, I guess by skimming it from the surface with a magic pooper-scooper and filling all our gas tanks at a ridiculous discount. He must maintain his cool in a crisis, while simultaneously conveying that he is mad as hell and not going to take it anymore, scowling and wringing his hands and stamping his feet like a petulant child. You know, so people can feel assured that he “feels our pain.” Because if he isn’t running around like a chicken with his head cut off, he’s really not “doing enough.” Bull. Forget the reality of the narrative. How about reporting the reality of reality. Regardless of the level of weeping and gnashing of teeth, the well will continue to leak until either the internal and external pressures equalize, or it is capped by British Petroleum. No amount of “feeling our pain” is going to change that. Fretting on camera about a now threatened seafood industry isn’t going to stop all that dispersed oil from settling in the oyster beds and ruining the crop. This just in: reality bites. Always has. And it’s never been as fun and sexy as the “narrative” the media likes to peddle. But it is what it is. And last time I checked, the truth - or at least some reasonable facsimile - is what the news media has been tasked to deliver to us. Are we really at the point as a nation where we allow the voices in our heads and our fact-deficient narratives to crowd out the cold harsh light of reality?

Violence erupted in Kingston, Jamaica last week as police attempted to arrest and deport notorious cocaine trafficker and arms dealer Michael Christopher Coke to the United States. The shooting started when police appeared at the Tivoli Gardens garrison to take Coke into custody after news broke that Jamaican president Bruce Golding had hired a lobbying firm to lobby the U.S. government against extraditing Coke to Miami to face trafficking and murder charges. Many people in Jamaica believe - and perhaps rightly so - that if Coke were to be taken into custody by the police he might never make it to the United States to stand trial. For decades the country has been plagued by political corruption and the incestuous relationship between the government and the drug trade. Eighteen years ago, Coke’s father, Lloyd Lester Coke burned to death in his prison cell just days before his scheduled extradition to the United States on trafficking and murder charges. Speculation is that he knew too many things about the government/drug dealer relationship, and that his son now faces the same fate. Though negotiations are ongoing, Coke has thus far refused to turn himself in. I used to wonder why my Dad hasn’t returned to Jamaica since he left it at the age of 18. I don’t wonder anymore.

Researchers at the Boston University School of Medicine, utilizing technology developed by a small Canadian bio-tech firm has developed what might be a cure for the Ebola virus. When administered to the group of test monkeys, the anti-viral agent proved 100% effective in neutralizing the Ebola virus. Human trials have yet to be conducted and more research is being made into extending the window for administering the drug beyond 48 hours, but if it holds up to testing, we may be looking at the ability to control - if not eliminate - the threat posed by one of the most deadly strains of virus known to man. How’s that for some good news.

In advance of a ridiculously positive earnings report, Toyota announced last week that it is entering into a 50 million dollar partnership with Tesla Motors to build electric cars. For those who do not follow the automobile universe, the Palo Alto-based Tesla produces all-electric vehicles for public consumption. Their flagship vehicle is the Tesla Roadster, a 2-seater sports car that travels 245 miles on a single charge and shreds 0-60 in 3.7 seconds, as seen below.

All this with a 7-year, 100,000 mile battery that charges in 3.5 hours from a 240V outlet. A couple years ago, the company announced plans to produce a 4-door luxury all-electric sedan with a 300-mile charge range in the $50,000 price range, about $14,000 less than what one might expect to pay for a Cadillac Escalade. (As a point of comparison, the Chevrolet Volt travels only 40 miles on a single charge and is estimated to cost about $40,000 prior to the $7,500 energy rebate.) Reference the following image.

The announcement of the Toyota partnership and the Toyota production factory that goes along with it means that perhaps Tesla will be able to reduce that $50,000 price point and bring the all-electric vehicle to a wider audience. I am very interested.

Did a double take at this statistic when it flashed across my screen the other day. Apple Computer is now worth more money than Microsoft and Wal-mart. That is not a misprint. In fact, the only company in the United States worth more than Apple is Exxon. And with 2 million iPads sold and counting, and a new iPhone set to be unveiled next week, That may be only a short term deficiency. Seriously. How many iTunes downloads can they possibly be selling!

Al and Tipper Gore announced that they are separating after 40 years of marriage. Come on, forty years? After all this time? What's the point?

Finally, late last week, Lower Manhattan, Wall Street in particular, was attacked by a swarm of bees. Yes, bees. After a brief panic, the bees were sedated and captured by the NYPD’s resident beekeeper. I don’t know which is more frightening. The fact that entire swaths of New York City are attacked by bees, or the fact that it happens often enough for the New York City Police Department to keep a beekeeper on staff. Rumor has it the bees were upset over Bank of America’s refusal to renegotiate the adjustable rate mortgage they used to purchase that new hive in Hoboken.