Short Shift

I get two Fridays this week. Somehow that still doesn’t make up for the loss of that hour of sleep Sunday morning. So Tired. Will try to keep this one short.

This afternoon (Tuesday) Senator Chris Dodd unveiled his proposal for financial regulatory reform. A full 18 months after the near complete collapse of the global financial system. Sigh. I do not have the vocabulary to express how utterly exasperating it is that almost two years after we found out how throughly Wall Street ripped us off, we still have no agreement on setting up rules to prevent this disaster from happening again. If you have a little time to kill and a rage quotient to fill, read “The Big Short,” by journalist and author Michael Lewis, (perhaps best known as author of “The Blindside”). If you have that much time and need the Cliff Notes version, see the following:

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Apparently there’s going to be some kind of vote in the House on the healthcare reform bill sometime this week. Maybe. You know what? I don’t really care anymore. In the words of one of my favorite columnists; Pass. The Damn. Bill. Wake me up when the voting’s over.

In a related story, this “deem and pass” strategy the House leadership has come up with in an effort to appear as though they are not voting for something they are voting for is absolutely ridiculous. At a time when Democrats’ own constituents are bemoaning all the horse-trading and the back-room deals and the sausage-making process of legislation, the House leadership is considering utilizing a tactic that doesn’t make any sense and that nobody can explain. Do Democrats really think that if they simply declare the bill passed, Republicans will go easy on them and neglect to mention the whole healthcare thing in their election campaigns this fall? What planet are you people living on?

Several weeks ago, Google announced that they were considering shutting down their Chinese operations in response to the hacking of their Gmail service. This week it appears as though Google might actually be serious. Chinese-based employees of the company have begun circulating their resumes and hundreds of advertisers are looking for alternative search engines on which to advertise. Some have signed letters to Google claiming their livelihood depends almost solely upon the company’s presence in China, begging them to stay and work something out with the government. It remains to be seen whether or not Google is listening. But the entire experiment of American-style internet pseudo-freedom in China has allowed for an interesting study in corporate motivation. The reality of government censorship - a complete anathema to everything the internet stands for - was not enough to cause Google to rethink its Chinese operations. Corporate espionage however, that was a whole different story. Once again, money talks. B.S. walks.

Last Friday, the Texas State Board of Education revised its guidelines for statewide social studies curriculum. Among the changes are a new emphasis on the Second Amendment, (amendments one through nine be damned), the removal of the word “democratic” from any description of the federal government, and study of the decline in value of the U.S. dollar in relation to the abandonment of the gold standard. Even Thomas Jefferson failed to make the cut as an influential thinker in the founding of America. The board also declined to include any new references to any contributions from prominent minorities - in a state where if minorities are not currently the majority, they soon will be. Ordinarily, the educational decisions of a single state would be of little to no consequence to the 49 others. But, this is Texas. And together with California, they comprise the two largest school districts in the country, and because of this, very important to the textbook publishing industry. In an industry in which money is scarce, publishers have little interest in printing 50 slightly different versions of the same book. So what they do instead is print only a few versions, based on the standards adopted by the largest school districts, and distribute them across the country. Thus in many respects, as goes Texas, so goes a significant portion of the country. Now, it takes a special kind of crazy to deny that the philosophy of Thomas Jefferson - author of the Declaration of Independence - played a significant roll in the founding of America, or to claim as one board posit as one board member did, that the civil rights movement led to “unrealistic expectations for equal outcomes.” But it would be nice if we could keep this kind of crazy out of the educational system. I know, it’s Texas. It’s hot, and the heat does terrible things to human brains. (Sorry Chris, I kid because I love.) But certainly we owe our kids a better social studies guide than episodes of the Glen Beck show.

Finally, in case you haven’t heard, Tiger Woods is returning to golf. This coming April, Woods will return to the tee at Augusta National in an attempt to capture his fifth Masters Championship. And no one is more excited about his return than the president of CBS. Since Tiger left the tour last year the ratings for golf on television have been abysmal. In no other sport is the absence of a single athlete so detrimental to the game. Oddsmakers have already made him the favorite to win the tournament, after what will by that time will have been a more than six month hiatus from golf. Looks like the head of CBS won’t be the only one rolling in dough the following Monday.

Winter Wonderland

Yesterday was the shortest day of the year. Funny. Work didn’t feel any shorter. Oh well. In the spirit of the season, here are your Christmas quick hits.

After almost a year of futzing around, the Senate is finally ready to vote to continue wrangling. In a brilliant display of politicking, Nebraska Senator Ben Nelson held Democrats hostage until they offered him billions of dollars in healthcare-related bribes in exchange for his 60th and final vote to break the Republican-led filibuster. In addition to Lieberman’s objections, Nelson claimed the language in the Senate bill restriction abortion was not strict enough, favoring instead the language used in the House version. But his hold-out was somewhat of a red herring, if you’ll pardon the cliche expression. Public funding for abortion has never been part of the bill, and Nelson is well aware that the “Blue Dog” coalition of Democrats in the House will refuse to vote for final passage if their version of the abortion language is not included. So it was never necessary for both versions of the bill to have the same abortion language. However, due to the way the Senate functions, Nelson was able to hold the entire process hostage until Democratic leaders payed his ransom.

Following a final vote Thursday morning, the House and Senate versions of the Healthcare reform bill with go to conference committee where they will be spliced together to form one bill messy piece of legislation, which will then be returned to Congress for yet another vote before reaching the President’s desk. That of course means Congressional Democrats will get yet other opportunity to fail at something they’ve been attempting to accomplish since before man landed on the moon. Failure is still very much an option.

Republican Senators have been complaining since the weekend about the bribes offered to Ben Nelson in exchange for his vote. Right. Like they somehow weren’t aware of the way Congress works. Some of the grumbling is due to the fact that they will no longer be able to hold up this round of voting. And the rest might be more credible if those moaning loudest about corruption of the process weren’t busy taking full advantage of said corrupt process for the past ten months. Chief sourpuss South Carolina Republican Lindsey Graham, while complaining bitterly about all the “pork” being written into the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act (stimulus bill) this past February, inserted hundreds of millions of dollars of his own “pork” into a bill he never intended to vote for. On some level it feels as if the criticism of Nelson’s deal is a little bit of sour grapes. Truth is, any one of 40 Republican Senators could have gotten the same deal Nebraska received - maybe even better. I’m sure there would have been some premium attached to the only Republican vote for a Democratic bill. Instead, the GOP opted for a policy of “just say no.” It remains to be seen where that will leave them as the economy picks up in the coming months.

The Department of Transportation has issued new rules regarding air travel delays. Among them is a mandate that passengers onboard an airplane stranded on the tarmac must be allowed to return to the gate and deplane if the problem preventing take-off lasts longer than three hours. The changes come in response to horror stories reported earlier this year about passengers being stuck on airplanes without air conditioning and overflowing toilets for up to eight hours, while the airlines did nothing but make excuses as to why it would be impossible for them to reform their practices. Amazing how the impossible becomes possible when lawsuits are threatened.

The World Conference on Climate Change in Denmark wrapped up last week with a global agreement to..., well..., work toward an agreement. Sigh. Ten years ago in Kyoto, world leaders decided that over the next decade they would determine a target for reduction of greenhouse gases and a global temperature rise limit, and fold them into a binding treaty they would sign this year in Copenhagen. Ten years later, nothing has been resolved. Lofty goals have been set, and promises have been made, but no one is winning to codify anything in writing. So, after two weeks of haggling, world leaders finally agreed that they couldn’t agree, and vowed to do the same thing they vowed to do ten years ago - keep talking. What’s the definition of insanity? Repeating the same action while expecting a different result? Head, meet wall.

In what was perhaps the most bizarre story of the week, authorities in Poland awoke last Friday morning to discover the infamous iron sign above the entrance to the Auschwitz concentration camp had been stolen. Police did manage to recover the sign two days later, cut into three pieces and stuffed in the back of a car. Five men have been arrested in connection to the theft. I guess I didn’t realize there was a market for concentration camp signage.

Around the NFL, Week 15:

The Colts won again, and the Saints lost their first. That, in combination with my three point elimination from my fantasy football league playoffs totally killed my weekend. New Orleans can make it up to everyone by being the last team standing on February 3rd.

Despite the Colts perfect record, the San Diego Chargers might be the best football team this week, and going into the playoffs. They are certainly the only team in the AFC capable of knocking off Indianapolis.

After their loss to previously one-win Tampa Bay, I’m almost ashamed to admit I purchased a Seahawks jersey during my trip out there two weeks ago. I mean come on! The Bucs? Even losing to Cleveland or Kansas City would have been more respectable.

Six months ago the Chicago Bears traded one Kyle Orton to Denver for Jay “the Messiah” Cutler. Every single pundit waxed poetic about how the Bears were now an instant contended and that the Broncos obviously got the short end of the stick. Turns out Denver scored a fairly consistent passer and a playoff spot, while Chicago wound up with the league interception leader and a share of the NFC cellar with Detroit. Oops.

The bloom is off the rose in Minnesota. The Vikings dropped another game to a mediocre team, Adrian Peterson was less than impressive - again, the defense gave up big plays to a backup quarterback, and the legendary quarterback is feuding with the coach. Don’t be surprised if this team is picked off before the conference championship.

The Cincinnati Bengals lost wide receiver Chis Henry last week after he fell from a moving vehicle and later died from his injuries. Even though they lost to San Diego on Sunday, they played inspired football in Henry’s honor, and will be a serious contender for the title in the weeks to come. These are not the same old Bengals.

My Super Bowl picks for Week 15; New Orleans Saints vs. San Diego Chargers.

Finally, Merry Christmas everyone! Or, Happy Holidays. Whichever is more applicable. And, between stuffing yourself with Christmas pudding and stuffing the trunk of the car with presents, don’t forget to spend a little time with the people you care about. Those are the things you’ll remember long after you’ve worn holes in that new sweater grandma gives you.